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Kimo adds more details to the sketch. I increase my exercises so that I can continue to carry Kimo when he wants me too. I also weigh myself and find out I weigh 790 pounds. I also apparently grew two inches to 6'5". Thats weird, but it doesn't happen again, the height growth, I mean
Kimo is on the balcony with the maple board and the board is the thing that has become the thing he goes to first in the morning and the last thing at night. He sits on the concrete with the board across his thighs and the crayon in his tripod grip and the grip is the thing that is steady now. He is adding details and the details are the thing that is the new layer — not just walls and studs and ladders but the things inside the walls. He draws the wiring and the wiring is the thing he saw Marco do last week and the seeing is the thing that became the line and the line is the thing that is the curved copper inside the wall.
"Wire go here," he says. "Wire carry power. Power make lights. Lights make dark go away. Marco put wire in wall. Wall keep wire safe."
He draws the plumbing next — the pipes as straight lines with elbows at the corners and the elbows are the thing he calls "elbow like Mama arm" and the comparison is the thing that is the connecting and the connecting is the thing he does now without thinking. Everything connects to everything. The pipe is like the arm. The arm is like the wrench. The wrench is like the jaw. The jaw is like the mouth. The mouth is the thing that says the words and the words are the thing that draws the pictures.
Lena watches him from the balcony rack and the watching is the thing she does between sets. She has increased her training and the increased is the thing that is the decision she made three weeks ago — the decision that says Kimo is 150 pounds and 150 pounds is the thing that is growing and the growing is the thing that means she needs to be stronger than the growing. She presses 680 now and the 680 is the thing that went up from 630 in increments of ten pounds per week. She squats 540. She deadlifts 640. She does weighted pushups with 120 pounds on her back and the 120 is the plate she balances between her shoulder blades and the balancing is the thing her core holds without shifting.
The bar feels lighter and the lighter is the thing that is the wrong word because the bar is not lighter — she is stronger. The strength is the thing that is the responding and the responding is the thing her body does when she asks it for more. She asks and the body gives. The body has always given. The wish asked and the body gave. She asks and the body gives. The difference is the thing that is the source — the wish asked first and now she asks and the asking is her own.
She steps on the scale after the workout and the scale is the thing she keeps on the balcony next to the rack. The scale is industrial — rated to a thousand pounds, a steel platform she bought online the month she crossed 500. The number comes up and the coming up is the thing that is the digital and the digital is the thing that is the settling and the settling is the number.
Seven hundred and ninety.
Lena looks at the number and the looking is the thing that is the processing. Seven-thirty was the last weigh-in and the last was the thing that was weeks ago and the weeks are the thing that have been full of food and lifting and running and the running is the thing she still does — eight miles on grass, barefoot, with the stroller. Sixty pounds in the span and the span is the thing she does not calculate because the calculating is the thing she does with performance, not with weight. The weight is the thing that happens. The performance is the thing she tracks.
She measures her height against the door frame and the door frame is the thing that has the pencil marks and the pencil marks are the thing she put there months ago. The mark for 6'3" is where it was. She stands against the frame and the standing is the thing that is the flat — heels against the baseboard, back against the frame, head level. The top of her head is above the mark. The above is the thing that is the two inches and the two inches is the thing she measures twice and the twice is the thing that says the same.
Six-five.
She stares at the mark and the staring is the thing that is the weird. The weird is the thing she does not have a word for in the context of height because height is the thing that stops and the stopping is the thing that happened at eighteen or twenty or whatever age the growth plates close and the closing is the thing that is the biology and the biology is the thing that does not add two inches at twenty-four. She looks at her feet and the feet are the thing that are bare and the bare is the thing that is the flat on the floor and the floor is the thing that is the same. She is not wearing shoes. She is not on her toes. She measures a third time and the third is the same.
Six-five. Seven-ninety. The numbers are the things that are the new and the new is the thing she holds the way she holds all the numbers — in the body, not in the worry. The height is the thing that is the weird and the weird is the thing she notes and moves past because moving past is the thing she does. She picks up Kimo and the picking up is the thing that is 150 pounds and the 150 is the thing that is easy and the easy is the thing that is the point. He wraps his arms around her neck and the neck is the thing that is wider than it was and the wider is the thing that is the muscle and the muscle is the thing that holds him.
"Mama taller," Kimo says. He is looking down at the floor from a height he did not have yesterday and the height is the thing he notices because Kimo notices the things that change.
"Yeah," Lena says. "A little."
"Mama biggest," Kimo says. The saying is the thing that is the category and the category is the thing that is the true.