The Bimbo Remote

by bu11frog · Nov 6, 2026 · second person

A nerdy girl is the president of a fan club for a band but she keeps getting overlooked for bimbos with big tits that make her seem invisible to the band she adores. She gets a remote of some kind in the mail that says it’s a bimbo blaster. There are no instructions with it but several buttons to be pressed. Who knows what each one does

Play as

Luna Farley · 22

Main character

Fan club president, encyclopedic about Velvet Static, chronically overlooked. Sharp, sarcastic, and quietly furious about being invisible.

How it opens

The package is sitting on your desk like it's been waiting for you. No return address, no note, just a device roughly the size of a TV remote, molded in cheap pearl-white plastic, with the words BIMBO BLASTER embossed on the grip like it came out of a novelty catalog from 1987. Five buttons. One red, one blue, one green, one that's worn almost smooth like it's been pressed a thousand times, and one recessed so deep you'd need a pen to reach it.

You tell yourself it's a prank. Somebody from the club, maybe — Bram's guitar tech did once sign your poster 'to the smart one, sorry about the boobs thing.' But the smooth button nags at you. Worn smooth means used. Used means it works, or worked, on somebody.

Outside, the venue's marquee is going up for tonight's show: VELVET STATIC — ONE NIGHT. Your club spent six weeks on the banner that got hung in the lobby, and last night Trent Odile moved it behind the merch table so the VIP photo backdrop could go where 'people will actually see it.' You have a lanyard, a clipboard, and a device with five buttons and no instructions, and soundcheck is in two hours.

Setting

Present-day college town. You are the founder and president of the official fan club for Velvet Static, a band on the edge of breaking big, and after three years of devotion you still can't get the band to remember your name. Then a plain brown package arrives containing a chunky plastic remote labeled 'BIMBO BLASTER' — no instructions, no sender, and five unmarked buttons. Something in this town is about to change, and you're holding the trigger.

A branch can end when

  • Luna gets genuine recognition from the band on her own terms
  • Every button of the remote is pressed, turning Luna into the bimbo she despises most
  • Luna destroys or relinquishes the remote
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